Breaking the Taboo of 'Mainstream Porn'
Feminist and ethical porn aims to show real people having more realistic sex, and that’s a beautiful thing. But what if that doesn’t really do it for you? What if you like corny storylines, and actually want the doctor to get it on with their patient? Are you a terrible person for liking facials?
Fear not, being into mainstream porn does not make you a bad person (or a bad feminist). But it is important to know where you stand on what you’re seeing. Here are a couple of important things to remember when consuming Big Porn...
Learn to separate fantasy from reality.
Mainstream porn is kinda like a summer blockbuster—it’s made to titillate, not to imitate reality. And the performers are bringing their A-game, not having a weeknight quickie under the covers. Not that you can’t try what you see at home, but it takes practice and communication to deepthroat, do the pile-driver or even have anal sex! In real life, not everyone is DTF 24/7, penises might be smaller and vaginas might have some hair. And there's real-life safety to consider.
It’s also important to remember that porn is a performance, and performers usually have a different relationship off-screen—in all likelihood, they have a friendly but platonic relationship, even if they show genuine pleasure. In between takes, they talk about their limits, break for lunch and to use the bathroom. Hopefully, that puts what you see on camera into a different context.
Don’t assume that only ‘men’ consume this kind of porn.
There’s no denying that a lot of porn is made to cater to the male gaze, but that doesn’t mean it’s the exclusive property of men. There are all kinds of men and women, and gender is no indicator of sexual desire, so it’s helpful to leave this kind of thinking behind. All kinds of people watch mainstream porn, and let’s be honest, boobs and butts *are* amazing. The most important thing is that nobody involved feels degraded.
Don't judge a book by its cover.
When you think of a porn performer, do you think of blonde hair, fake boobs and a tiny waist? Well, so do a lot of people, but there are people of all ages, sizes, races, genders and sexual orientations working in porn. Just like regular models and actors, porn performers make their money with their bodies, and many diet and exercise accordingly. That doesn’t mean that their bodies are bad, or that other bodies are bad! Ultimately, we do think that more types of bodies should be shown on camera, but understand that these are real people, too.
Watch porn that prioritizes everyone’s pleasure.
The stereotype is that mainstream porn prioritizes male pleasure, making women little more than vehicles to achieve that. But how many of these movies have you really watched? And how many romantic comedies have you seen that also contributed to stereotypes about female pleasure?
Lately, more and more porn is showing just as much manual stimulation and cunnilingus as fellatio, so that women’s pleasure is clearly made priority. In addition, more big studios are venturing into non-hetero territory, understanding that their content should be as varied as their audiences. Hopefully, though, they’re working on more interesting endings than just cumshots!
Learn to see porn on a spectrum, not as a monolith.
Many filmmakers make work against the mainstream, which is thought to lack creativity. While we’re fans of 'creative' work, we don’t believe that the many other producers and performers in the industry are just going through the motions. Another famous producer, Jiz Lee, said it best when she pointed out the buzzword ‘ethical porn’ assumes that only companies claiming their work to be ethical are doing ethical work. There is a lot to be seen and even celebrated in the mainstream, and we think that fantasy is just as important to reality when it comes to sexual desire.
Pay for it!
If you want to be an ethical porn consumer, it’s crucial to pay for what you watch! Not only does this support producers and performers, but it ensures that companies are producing work under safer conditions. Remember, tube sites can be fun and easy to use, but it’s not always possible to know who made that porn, or how.
Hopefully, the more accessible porn is, the more people feel free to speak up and say what they like. Both performers and consumers should feel safe and empowered in their choices, so armed with that knowledge, go forth and get off!
